Today what impells me to write is not some sudden epiphany hitting me while I stare at the ceiling fan, but an observation of a general phenomenon. It is a realization which I count as significant enough to be shared at some platform.
So I was sitting and pondering over a recent incident which took place two days back in a car and I was one of the passive victims. I have shared it later in the post. Unknowingly the pondering transformed into a clash between the feminist inside me and my Muslim self. You may have guessed it right because I was dwelling over how my religion was rooted in patriarchy and how it was criticized for giving men superiority over women in numerous spheres of life. Was I being one of the critic by not taking the blame of what happened or was I shaming my feminist alter ego by submissively accepting the patriarchal values of my religion? *Inner conflict alerts!*
Upon some thinking and exploration I was relieved to know that the problem was not in the religion but the pitiful followers because the guidelines seemed to be perfectly based upon some scientific research. Men had been given superiority over women because they were, both, physically and mentally stronger than women. Now those radical feminists who might be angrily opening their mouths to say something, shall have a read of the next paragraph while those who already stand on the same ground as mine or do not care whatsoever shall skip the next 144 words =_=
Miller in his 1993 study found out that women exhibited only 52% of men’s upper body strength. A similar study in 1999 by Janssen found out that women had 40% less of the upper body skeletal muscle as compared to men. There are more examples aiding the hypothesis like the study by Leyk et al. On the other hand, a recent research by Marco del Geudice concluded and proved that the personality differences between men and women were hard to ignore: While women scored much higher in sensitivity, warmth and apprehension than men, men scored greater in emotional stability, dominance, rule-consciousness and vigilance. Hence men were predisposed to be emotionally stronger than women. Researchers have accounted biological differences like production of different hormones and biological make up to be the reason for such differences.
Now the point of stating those studies above and referring to the biological evidence is not to let women down. It is not to prove that women are weak, passive, submissive beings created to be bossed around by men and be kept locked up in a chicken coop behind the curtains. No. In fact these studies and researches would never be enough to prove such a narrow-minded, highly stereotypical and sick opinion as that! Ta da, plot twist-did you think I had decided to leave the feminist inside me to wail for forever? Never! But let me clear my grounds by announcing that I, for one, accept men’s superiority over women. Account that to my religion or the scientific evidence given above, it is completely up to you!
“Dear all men of this planet , I humbly accept your superiority, authority and power. Thy status is God-given, I shall not dare to speaketh against it! Pardon me if I ever again question your superiority (+_+)”
However what I refuse to accept is you cursing with ridicule as you speed past our driving school car where my friend sits in the driver’s seat learning and struggling to listen to the instructor’s directions and applying them at the same time. What I definitely refuse to accept is, five minutes later, another you nudging his truck-driver-friend to see in the direction of our car to witness the most hilarious scene before your truck speeds past.What I blatantly refuse to accept is every other motorcycle driver aka a MAN aka a YOU, gravely eyeing me, my friend and the lady instructor as if we are some aliens sent down from another planet (shall I be thankful that at least you were not eyeing sleazily? You decide)
So take me as a feminist who accepts and concedes men’s superiority over women but who would never, even for once, tolerate the psychological problems which follow after Les men higher status. I would not tolerate your superiority complex, your insecurities and your sheer indifference towards those who are under you. Your status is God-given, as I say, then do not be afraid of your counterparts learning a few skills same as yours. It is okay to see them drive and it is okay to see them work at office and it is okay to see them earn more money than you, because you would still stay superior, thanks to the predisposition O:-) Why do you start cursing and beating and shouting when your counterpart tries something new, when they want to try their luck on the same office seat as yours. Your dense beards and moustaches are not enough to hide your insecurities you see, and your crooked versions of Islam won’t protect you from the demons of your complex. I believe seeing a psychologist would be a better choice.
Shortly and conclusively (since I truly care for those kind ones who have read it down till here) the idea is not to criticize men, the idea is not to defend my religion. But it is definitely about voicing what you think is wrong and providing an open forum to those who think in the contrary. With my humble apologies to those whom I sounded super orthodox in the first half and super blasphemous in the second, I speak about the men my society breeds in general because they are largely different from the kind of men my religion tries to breed or teaches to breed. If one is given superiority and authority over a group of people, it is done by keeping in view the skills and abilities of the former. A leader has the responsibility to guide, help and give space to learn and foster for those under him. Men, particularly in the society I live, only tend to rote learn the first part. For the rest of the larger part, women are for sale, they are for mockery, they are for sexual gratification or they are for beating and been hidden behind seven pardas. I think it is about time that men realize their actual position in our society because there are some people who can see behind the facade of superiority (and I hope there are more who can speak up for it).
“Women will not have as much trouble accepting men’s superiority, the day they realize they are supposed to be our leaders, not our dictators!”